Corrupt a Wish Foundation #1

[CodeBrain]

Basically here's how it goes:

I start by making a wish, like:


I wish I had a dog.

Then another poster comes by, says something bad about that wish. Like so:


Granted, but the dog had to be put down.

Then the poster makes another wish. Then the game continues from there.

Lets start!


I wish I got a new 360.

[Mass]

I wish I got a new 360.

Granted, but it RRoD'd.

I wish the United States would stop funneling money into disastrous drug policies in central and South America.

[rossmum]

Granted, then a new president was voted in who reversed the decision.

I wish my internet would fucking work when it's supposed to.

[Mass]

Granted, then a new president was voted in who reversed the decision.

I wish my internet would fucking work when it's supposed to.

Granted, but the government filtered out all the websites you like.

I wish I had a hot cup of coffee, right now.

[mech]

Granted, but there's a bug in it :gross:

I wish Maria Carey would eat her own shit

[BobtheGreatII]

Granted, but there's a bug in it :gross:

I wish Maria Carey would eat her own shit

Granted, but she enjoys it. :gross:

I wish for more +rep.

[CodeBrain]

I wish for $3,000 for my dream computer.

Granted, but a thief took your $3000.

I wish I understood Japanese :saddowns:

[LlamaMaster]

Granted, but she enjoys it. :gross:

I wish for more +rep.
Granted, but it's from Terror.

I wish my computer would overclock properly.

[Boo Diddly]

Granted, but it's from Terror.

I wish my computer would overclock properly.

Granted, unfortunaltly your CPU gets fried.
Granted, unfortunatly your CPU gets fried due to someone spilling their drink on your motherboard.

I wish I could move out of my parents basement.

[Sever]

Granted, unfortunaltly your CPU gets fried.

I wish I could move out of my parents basement.
You move into their attic.

I wish we didn't have threads like this.

[Mr Buckshot]

Granted, but a thief took your $3000.

I wish I understood Japanese :saddowns:

Granted, but you can't go to Japan to use it.

I wish I knew Muay Thai martial arts.

[mech]

Granted, but you have polio.

I wish I had free food for life.

[rossmum]

Granted, but you can't go to Japan to use it.

I wish I knew Muay Thai martial arts.
granted but then the universe puts you on global ignore http://sa.tweek.us/emots/images/emot-owned.gif

i wish i had some food

e/ FUCK MECH

[LlamaMaster]

Granted, unfortunaltly your CPU gets fried
Sorry, try again. The key word in my post was properly, so work around that.

[Boo Diddly]

Sorry, try again. The key word in my post was properly, so work around that.

Granted, but it still got fried.

LF1M bedroom PST

[Chainsy]

granted but then the universe puts you on global ignore http://sa.tweek.us/emots/images/emot-owned.gif

i wish i had some food

e/ FUCK MECH
Granted, but the food was made in a toy factory in China

I wish my left pinky would go back to being pink.

[FRain]

Granted, but then your pinky was later put through a table saw by your friends to see what would happen.

I wish I could get new computer parts.

[teh lag]

Granted, but they're all DOA.

I wish people would stop being dicks.

[Rentafence]

Granted, but everyone is still dumb

I wish I knew what to wish for

[sdavis117]

Granted, but you now wish for someone to rob you.

I wish for a working Fiber Optic line.

[OmegaDragon]

You get a working fiber optic line, however your internet company goes bankrupt and closes.

I wish the first time I made this thread about a year ago it didn't get locked by Jcap due to retarded people.

[Gwunty]

Granted but op turned into codebrain.

I wish I had registered at gearbox instead of lurking.

[flibitijibibo]

Granted, but you get banned and migrate back to here.

I wish someone here needed a audiophile/composer for a mod.

[sdavis117]

Granted, but it's for a Bloodgulch mod.

I wish that the sky was green all the time.

[Rentafence]

Granted, but it's the Aurora Borealis and you're in Antarctica,

I wish my Xbox didn't get the RROD

[sdavis117]

Granted, but you stepped on it and now it is in peices scattered across your room.

I wish I had a million dollars.

[Dwood]

Granted, but you stepped on it and now it is in peices scattered across your room.

I wish I had a million dollars.

Granted, but the government taxed it all with the bailout bill.

I wish I could Code in C#.

[ICEE]

Granted, but the government taxed it all with the bailout bill.

I wish I could Code in C#.

granted but a massive EMP strike destroys all electronics in the civilized world.

I wish Colbert was president

[Chainsy]

Granted but Al gore is vice president.

I wish I was a real boy.

[sdavis117]

Al Gore was a good VP.

Granted, but you now have AIDS.

I wish that there was no world hunger.

[Bodzilla]

Edit: FFFFF spartan >:U!!11
granted but girls dont like your long wooden.... nose.

i wish i had super saiyan hair.
heh.

[sdavis117]

Granted, but you are defeated by Goku and his (over) 9000 powerlevel.

I wish I had cake.

[Bodzilla]

Granted but it's shaped like a dick

Wish i could make wish's

[sdavis117]

Granted, but you can only wish for pain and suffering for you and your friends, and happy times for those you hate.

I wish that I could divide by zero.

[teh lag]

Granted. All of mathematics has to be rewritten because of that. The math community harasses you for the rest of your life as revenge.

I wish I could resize images and have them turn out the way I expect them to.

[sdavis117]

Granted, but they are deleted after 5mins.

I wish I had a fish.

[CodeBrain]

Granted, but the fish was a shark and ate you.

I wish I had Modding Talent.

[LlamaMaster]

Granted, but the fish was a shark and ate you.

I wish I had Modding Talent.
Granted, but you are dragged down by a team and nothing ever gets released.

I wish I had fighting pubic hairs.

Edit: Beat you fucker. HAHA

[Syuusuke]

Granted, then you get some CMT-related drama.

I wish, I wish, with all my heart, to fly with dragons, in a land apart

Fu-


I wish I had fighting pubic hairs.

Granted, but they start ripping eachother out, and that hurts.

[teh lag]

Granted. You are slowly driven insane as you ponder the implications of a half-male half-female dragon.

I wish I would stop spilling stuff on my pants.

[LlamaMaster]

Granted. You are slowly driven insane as you ponder the implications of a half-male half-female dragon.

I wish I would stop spilling stuff on my pants.
Granted, but your friends now laugh at your skirt.

I wish I could piss streams of molten gold.

[Syuusuke]

Granted but, yea you burn your peeny out.

I wish I could be impervious to pain.

[Chainsy]

Wish granted, but the dragons have down syndrome and fly you into a volcano.

I wish that corrupting wishes made them better, not worse

OH SNAP FUCKING JUST TURNED THIS FUCKING THREAD UPSIDE DOWNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

[teh lag]

No, you didn't.

Granted. Your wish causes a logical breakdown in the universe and shit fucking blows up everywhere forever.

I wish people didn't ruin threads like this.

[LlamaMaster]

No, you didn't.

Granted. Your wish causes a logical breakdown in the universe and shit fucking blows up everywhere forever.

I wish people didn't ruin threads like this.
Grante.....wait, no, that is impossible.

Edit: Touhou avatar kawaii kekekekeke

Edit 2: I'm such a weeaboo faggot.

Edit 3: Brb, fapping.

Edit 4: That didn't last long.

[Dwood]

Wish granted, but the dragons have down syndrome and fly you into a volcano.

I wish that corrupting wishes made them better, not worse

OH SNAPJUST TURNED THIS THREAD UPSIDE DOWNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!

EDIT: NOOOOO Teh lag stole it...

LOL

Granted, but wishes don't come true IRL

I wish my sister wouldn't watch Disney Channel any more.

[LlamaMaster]

^ Granted, but now she watches playboy. (which would be a positive for any of you incestuous /a/ users)

I wish this thread were locked before I/anybody else ruins it more.

[Hotrod]

Granted, but then it opens up again a second later.

I wish life was happy...

[teh lag]

^ Granted, but now she watches playboy.

I wish this thread were locked before I/anybody else ruins it more.

Granted. The funnies are over and life returns to normal.

I wish I had done that with my last post.

e : hotrod

god damnit hotrod

ruining my groove

MY GROOVE

[CodeBrain]

What.




There is no reason to lock.




Edit: Proof.

There is no sight of thread derail, spam, or any of the choices. The game is functioning correctly, and thats it. You can't lock a thread unjust, because there is nothing to lock it for. At least come up with a reason instead of locking it because a user said so.

Quite honestly, I believe that as childish.

[LlamaMaster]

What.




There is no reason to lock.




No.
Uhhh, you best relock this thread. Don't mess with Lag.

[Hotrod]

Granted. The funnies are over and life returns to normal.

I wish I had done that with my last post.

e : hotrod

god damnit hotrod

ruining my groove

MY GROOVE
Sorry, I'm gonna go and cry for being mean to you now.:(

[teh lag]

Don't mess with Lag.

:caruso:

Know what, it's already April Fool's day in some places and I'm in a good mood.

Funnies reinstated.

I wish I don't end up regretting this. like fuck i won't, i always regret bending to you people

[ExAm]

Granted, but you end up regretting everything else you ever did.

I wish I had a job.

[CodeBrain]

Uhhh, you best relock this thread. Don't mess with Lag.

Now I would agree to not messing with Lag. The thread however is not either:

1. Derailing
2. Offtopic (For god sakes we are IN offtopic :P )
3. In a SPAM

If you actually looked at the thread, you would see none of the above happening. The game is still on, no locking is needed.

This is why I believe teh lag's choice was wrong. He choosed to lock because of your response. I find that hardly a good reason to lock a thread which has nothing bad going to it.

[teh lag]

GAH I DECIDED TO LET YOU PEOPLE DO YOUR THINGS AGAIN SO GO AND DO THEM


Granted, but you end up regretting everything else you ever did.

I wish I had a job.

Granted. You now pick up bird turds from rooftops.

I wish people would go with the flow more.

[CodeBrain]

Wish granted, however they flow all over you :haw:

I wish people would actually look at threads before locking it :downs:

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, but the only flow you're going with is in the sewers.
E: gedout Code

I wish I could get an A on my physics test.

[p0lar_bear]

Granted, but the only flow you're going with is in the sewers.
E: gedout Code

I wish I could get an A on my physics test.

Granted, but the jocks beat the shit out of you for being a colossal nerd.

I wish I could draw.

[Gwunty]

Granted but you can only draw pensis

I wish to explode

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, but you do so in a zero G environment.
You explode, the particles move back together over millions of years under the force of gravity, you reform and the process continues forever.

E: orite, need to make a wish.
I wish http://sa.tweek.us/emots/images/emot-colbert.gif was an emote.

[Sever]

Granted, but you do so in a zero G environment.
You explode, the particles move back together over millions of years under the force of gravity, you reform and the process continues forever.

E: orite, need to make a wish.
I wish http://sa.tweek.us/emots/images/emot-colbert.gif was an emote.It becomes one, then everyone overuses it.

I wish this thread were locked.

[klange]

It becomes one, then everyone overuses it.

I wish this thread were locked.
Granted, but then an entire board is created dedicated to it.
I wish I knew what to do with my second Dell Mini 9.

[Mass]

Granted, but then an entire board is created dedicated to it.
I wish I knew what to do with my second Dell Mini 9.
Granted, you figure out how to turn it into a time machine, but inevitably cause a paradox and destroy the universe.

I wish Half-Life 2 Ep. 3 was going to come out very soon.

[n00b1n8R]

You realise that you can donate it to charity.
The computer is sent across the world to help developing nations, but ends up in the hands of a terrorist network. They use your computer to devise Super-Evil-Terrorist-Plot-To-Destroy-The-World-#37™ which results in the death of everyone and everything you love.

I wish my e-peen were bigger.

E:FUCK THAT'S TWICE IN LESS THAN AN HOUR

[ExAm]

Mass: It does, but it's missing textures and the dialog sounds like filler.
Noob: It becomes as large as a Mack truck (see what I did there?), rendering you immobile. Sexy women run from you in terror. Your immediate vicinity is quarantined and you are airlifted by two chinook helicopters to a secret military facility where your massive member is tested and subjected to horrendous experiments as scientists attempt to create money-making penis enlargement drugs from your horrendously mutated DNA. In pain, you cry yourself to sleep every night as you rest your head on your ridiculously ginormous and cancerous cock.

I wish awesome people started mapping for CE again.

[sdavis117]

Granted, but they are all generic box maps.

I wish that something horrible would happen to me.

[Boba]

You become a republican.

I wish I could fit thirteen golf balls into my rectum.
http://i.somethingawful.com/forumsystem/emoticons/emot-munch.gif

[ThePlague]

You become a born again christian.

I wish I could fit thirteen golf balls into my rectum.
Granted, but they turn into eggs and they hatch into little penis's

I wish I had pizza.

[klange]

E: Boba beat me to it.

I wish I had pizza.
Granted but it has the wrong toppings.

[b]e[b]: At next poster: ah, yes, but I don't have a wish.

I wish I had a wish to wish.

[Spartan094]

Granted, but they turn into eggs and they hatch into little penis's

I wish I had pizza.
Granted, your pizza turned out to be a cookie pizza from bill gates

I wish I had a modded xbox 360

EDIT: DAMN beat meh

[ExAm]

Your new modded Xbox 360 has been modified to display a pink background festooned with unicorns, and it now only plays Barbie's Horse Adventures for the Xbox.

I wish my airsoft gun wouldn't jam so much.

[klange]

Your new modded Xbox 360 has been modified to display a pink background festooned with unicorns, and it now only plays Barbie's Horse Adventures for the Xbox.

I wish my airsoft gun wouldn't jam so much.
Granted, but you shoot yourself with it repeatedly, causing death.

I wish I had a girlfriend. And "granted, but she's ugly" is cliche and unoriginal

[sdavis117]

Granted, but the Earth spins into the Sun and we all die.

I wish I had a working Windows 8 copy.

[klange]

Granted, but the Earth spins into the Sun and we all die.

I wish I had a working Windows 8 copy.

Granted, but the kernel is based on Darwin.

I wish Modacity would consume Halomods and make everyone there are bitches.

[ThePlague]

Granted, but the kernel is based on Darwin.

I wish Modacity would consume Halomods and make everyone there are bitches.
Granted, but it turns into Halomaps and we all become failures at everything we attempt to do.

I wish I could wish a good wish.

[Saggy]

Granted, but it turns into Halomaps and we all become failures at everything we attempt to do.

I wish I could wish a good wish.

Granted, but it ends up being a bad wish.

I wish for all the wishes in this thread to come true

[n00b1n8R]

Granted.

I wish for more wishes.

[ICEE]

Granted.

I wish for more wishes.

granted, but they all suck because you have no imagination

I wish for my squire strat back :(

[Phopojijo]

Granted.

I wish for more wishes.Granted, but then they were paid in Alien Ant Farm CDs.

I wish this thread was closed.

[Phopojijo]

Granted, but then I reopened it.

I wish I had more time.

[teh lag]

Granted, but then they were paid in Alien Ant Farm CDs.

I wish this thread was closed.

Granted. People whine about us staff having no sense of humor.

I wish Health class wasn't such an absolute fucking joke.

[ICEE]

Granted, but then I reopened it.

I wish I had more time.

granted, the earth spins half as fast giving you a 48 hour day. But unfortunately, this greatly effects the trajectory of the planet in space, and it escapes the sun's gravitational pull, hurtling into parts unknown. Ironically, the space station remains in the suns orbit, forever separating the scientists within from their home.

[flibitijibibo]

Granted, but health still sucks anyway. Now it's just not funny, taking all remaining entertainment out of it.

I wish Removable Disk (F:).

Gawdamn I'm hilarious.

[Sel]

I wish trinx would come back so we could roll pcs in CoH again.

[Syuusuke]

Granted, but Trinx doesn't want to play with you *heh Everquest*

I wish I was insane.

[Chainsy]

Granted, but you're thrown into a Hilary Clinton comeback convention, so no one can tell the difference.

I wish I had the ability to draw.

[legionaire45]

Granted, but the only thing you can draw is rule34.

I wish I could stay on task for more then 2 seconds.

[teh lag]

Granted, but the only thing you can draw is rule34.

I wish I could stay on task for more then 2 seconds.

Granted. You are now Taskmaster of Penis Junction.

I wish for there to be no spring allergies.

[klange]

Granted, but the only thing you can draw is rule34.

I wish I could stay on task for more then 2 seconds.
This is supposed to "Corrupt a Wish", as in bad things...

Also, granted, but you can only focus on things you don't normally care about.

e: Gotdamnit... Somebody go enable something that warns you when there's a new reply already there when you're posting... If phpBB has one, then vB sure as hell better have one...

[Con]

Granted. You are now Taskmaster of Penis Junction.

I wish for there to be no spring allergies.
Granted, but there are now twice as many deadly viruses.

I wish I had fallout 3 :downs:

[sdavis117]

Granted, but it has a glitch that replaces everything in the game with Unicorns.

I wish that this :) was a smilie.

Oh wait, it is.

[CSFLOYD]

Granted but it eventually frowns.

I wish I had five smashed glass bottles... IT HAS TO BE COKE!

[Disaster]

Granted but it eventually frowns.

I wish I had five smashed glass bottles... IT HAS TO BE COKE!

Granted you accidently step on the shattered glass and get several deep gashes on your feet which require stitches to heal.

I wish I had a new car.

[teh lag]

Granted. Your car spontaneously combusts in your driveway several days later.
ALTERNATE ENDING : Your car is stolen by a gang of masked hoodlums.
DIRECTOR'S CUT : A disgruntled auto worker painted a giant penis on the hood.

I wish I didn't feel so guilty about this thread having raised my average ppd.

[CSFLOYD]

Granted but later on it gets higher cause this thread gets worse.

I wish I could fly and shoot lasers out of my nipples, and had infinite poop to shit out, and my peeny pissed out molten hot gravy, my head was a mudkip head that turned everyone into a hippo with missle launchers when I licked them, my hands had elastic fingers, my eyes shot strings of silly putty that was unbreakable.

[teh lag]

Granted but later on it gets higher cause this thread gets worse.

I wish I could fly and shoot lasers out of my nipples, and had infinite poop to shit out, and my peeny pissed out molten hot gravy, my head was a mudkip head that turned everyone into a hippo with missle launchers when I licked them, my hands had elastic fingers, my eyes shot strings of silly putty that was unbreakable.

Granted. Despite your superpowers, you are ostracized from society due to how absolutely retarded that is.

I wish my net was more reliable.

[Disaster]

Granted. Despite your superpowers, you are ostracized from society due to how absolutely retarded that is.

I wish my net was more reliable.
Granted. Your highly reliable net gives you more time on the computer and less time to spend outside with your friends and you become a lazy bum and develop obesity and none of your friends like you anymore.

I wish I had an extra thousand rep points.

[Rentafence]

Granted, but they're negative rep points.

I wish I was an Oscar Meyer wiener.

[teh lag]

Granted. Your highly reliable net gives you more time on the computer and less time to spend outside with your friends and you become a lazy bum and develop obesity and none of your friends like you anymore.

I wish I had an extra thousand rep points.

Granted. You are still 1-2 thousand below the top members.

I wish I had made a better 2000th post.

E : SCRATCH THAT IT WAS ALSO POST #100 IN THE THREAD HOLY SHIT

I wish to not grimace and sigh upon waking up tomorrow to the happenings of April Fool's Day.

[Mr Buckshot]

Granted. You are still 1-2 thousand below the top members.

I wish I had made a better 2000th post.

E : SCRATCH THAT IT WAS ALSO POST #100 IN THE THREAD HOLY SHIT

I wish to not grimace and sigh upon waking up tomorrow to the happenings of April Fool's Day.

granted, but then you bang your head on the table instead of grimacing and sighing.

I wish Harvard hadn't rejected me :(

[CSFLOYD]

Granted but you dont get to go in the building.

I wish I was Mr.Peanut and I had an army of iguanas that had miniguns for arms and they breathed fire.

[Syuusuke]

Granted but you can only make one wish at a time, so not granted.

I wish everyday was April's Fools Day

[CSFLOYD]

Granted but you have to wait till 12:00:01 AM but it lasts till the end of tommarow.

I wish I could believe its butter.

[cheezdue]

Granted but it was condensed pee.

I wish I could get off modacity for at least a day.

[CSFLOYD]

Granted but you have no friends cause there all on Modacity so you are bored and you die a lonley miserable day.

I wish I could have posotive rep so I could enable my rep back up. lol :lmao:

[ICEE]

Granted but you have no friends cause there all on Modacity so you are bored and you die a lonley miserable day.

I wish I could have posotive rep so I could enable my rep back up. lol :lmao:

granted, but posotive is not a word

I wish I had enough $$ to fill up my gas tank

[Rentafence]

Granted, but your car breaks down.

I wish lag would pay attention to who's turn it is instead of posting like a spazz to get a +1

[ThePlague]

Granted, but your car breaks down.

I wish lag would pay attention instead of posting like a spazz to get a +1
Granted, but you get -rep for every post he doesn't make.

I wish I had a chocolate tree.

[ICEE]

granted, but he considers all your posts shitposts and bans you

I wish I lived by the ocean


FUUUUUUU- plague

[Rentafence]

The Plague: Granted, but the tree melts.

ICEE: No. :lol:

I wish I was an Oscar Meyer wiener.

[FRain]

Granted, but you're attached to someone's groin.

I wish I could get a job without hassle in the summer (minor work permit, etc)

[mech]

Granted, but you have to suck off men on the corner.

I wish my mod was done now.

[ThePlague]

Granted, but you have to suck off men on the corner.

I wish my mod was done now.
Granted, but no one downloads it.

I wish there weren't memes anymore.

[FRain]

Granted, but you get FALCON- PUNCHED to death.

I wish I could get new parts for my comp.

[Gwunty]

Granted but there stolen and the FBI get all like "uhh" in yo grillz

I wish doan would LICK MY PENISH

[RobertGraham]

Granted but there stolen and the FBI get all like "uhh" in yo grillz

I wish doan would LICK MY PENISH
Granted, but you get some herps

I wish I had a sense of humor :S

[FRain]

You get one, but your left pinky is shoved through a table saw.

Wish I had new parts to build my comp >_>

[mech]

Granted, but the agp doesn't go in the pci :downs:

I wish I had brown rep

[FRain]

Granted, but you missed the post by a mile, and monkeys threw your rep at you.

I wish i wasn't 5' 2"

[Con]

granted, you are now 4'7"

[ThePlague]

Damnit Conscars.

I wish I didn't fail at talking to gurls.

[CodeBrain]

Granted, you are now 4 inches.

I wish I more wishes.


E: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF PLAGE :maddowns:

Plague: Wish granted, but the girls are afraid

[Rentafence]

Not granted, syntax error

I wish for cesium

[mech]

Granted, but a black guy watches you pee.

I wish I had a 60 inch vertical

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but you missed the post by a mile, and monkeys threw your rep at you.

I wish i wasn't 5' 2"
Granted, you are now 3' 4"

I wish I had a MacBook Pro

[Rentafence]

Mech: Granted, but now you're gay.

RobertGraham: Not granted, because Roentgenium has a short half life

I wish people would stop fucking up the thread

[mech]

Granted, but people continue to fuck the thread up.

I wish I had a dog

[Rentafence]

Granted, but you lose your 60 inch vertical to a black guy watching your dog pee

I wish mech would post again

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but it's one of those 4chan meme dogs

I wish mech would post again
Granted, but you get detention

I still wish I had a MacBook Pro

[PlasbianX]

Granted, but there's something sticky all over the keyboard.

I wish I had a machine gun.

[ThePlague]

Granted, but there's something sticky all over the keyboard.

I wish I had a machine gun.
Granted, but you have no bullets.

I wish there were no such things as illegal downloads...

[dydo]

Granted, but you get detention

I still wish I had a MacBook Pro
Granted but you pay a $3000 extra fee for no reason.

I wish that no one will say something bad about this wish.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but then Biden takes over office

I wish I had a car and a job :(

[mech]

Granted, but you're ejected out the windshield on your way to work.

I wish I knew how to animate

[Ifafudafi]

Granted, but you're ejected out the windshield on your way to work.

I wish I knew how to animate

Granted, but you can only draw gory Yaoi.

I wish my students weren't asshole jackoffs.

[ThePlague]

Damnit Iffy

Granted, but they have penis heads.

I wish I had a better computer.

[ICEE]

granted, but oh wait its my computer.

I wish the dragonball movie wasnt going to be absolute shit

[mech]

Wish cannot be granted.

[Phopojijo]

Not on topic.

[HDoan]

I wish we can get back on topic

[ThePlague]

Granted, but the topic gets locked for being on-topic.

I wish there wasn't such thing as April Fools.

[Mass]

Granted, but the topic gets locked for being on-topic.

I wish there wasn't such thing as April Fools.
granted, but a new day is found for limitless shitposting

I wish I had some more bud, tbh

[SnaFuBAR]

granted, but DEA kicks in your door and you are charged with trafficking.

i wish for my diamonds to be turned to cash without the hassle of selling.

[Bodzilla]

granted, but the hitman betray you and your caboose is now on auction on ebay.
no one has bid.

i wish it would stop fucking raining >:U

[Cortexian]

granted, but the hitman betray you and your caboose is now on auction on ebay.
no one has bid.

i wish it would stop fucking raining >:U
Granted. It started hailing tennis ball sized ice.

I wish I could get everything I "need" (as opposed to want) for free.

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, but you get 1 mol of each.

I want the spy update.

[Cortexian]

Granted, but you get 1 mol of each.

I want the spy update.
Granted, but it's disguised as an Engineer!

I wish I could show up all the noobs on YouTube who build "Lego Warthogs".
(I could, but I'm too lazy)

[n00b1n8R]

wish already granted, but you only have square red bricks.

I wish I had a domestic pilot licence.

[ExAm]

Granted. You are now licensed to install and repair stove pilots, domestically.

I wish I

[Bodzilla]

wish granted. But what do you think?

i want booze.

[ExAm]

Congratulations. You have alcohol poisoning.

I wish I could get to sleep on time.

[Bodzilla]

you do, but your nightlife is royally boned.

Moar boobies.

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, but girls arn't into man-tittys.

I wish my best mate could think of a better idea for his second date then potato planting.

[ExAm]

He thinks of venus flytrap planting. Potato crops uprooted, You and your girlfriend starve to death from lack of an edible food source. The flytraps don't. Your corpses look quite tasty to a passing swarm of files.

I wish I could think of a reason i'm staying up this late.

[Bodzilla]

Wish granted.
Gay porn. it's the only explanation.

my hat is green now wtf. >:( i want a blue one >:(

[p0lar_bear]

Granted, but it's a propeller beanie. You look like a toolshed now.

I wish I could find a cell phone that isn't a bitch to customize.

[Wakeboy1337]

Granted but the service sucks.



I wish I could move with my girlfriend this summer.

[Rob Oplawar]

You both move, but in her new hometown she meets somebody she likes better and dumps you.

I wish for more wishes.

[p0lar_bear]

Granted, but you use them all up in rapid succession before wishing for more.

I wish the sun would explode in a supernova.

[Phopojijo]

Granted -- but it will happen in a few billion years.

I wish I may I wish I might. Ha! Good luck with that one!

[Inferno]

Granted, but it was I did.

I wish I was a moderator.

[CSFLOYD]

Granted but you dont have moderator powers.
I wish elites where real.

[cheezdue]

Granted, but only to be all killed by Master Chief.

I wished I had something to wish for.

[p0lar_bear]

Granted, but I take your spot in line.

I wish I could beat Dark Samus within the 7-minute time limit at the end of Metroid Prime 2 fffffffffffffffffffff

[Rentafence]

Granted, but then the power cuts out and the game doesn't save.

I wish I had a soda.

[Rob Oplawar]

Granted, but it's a Mr. Pibb. Gross.

I wish I hadn't totally blown it in high school.

[mech]

Granted, but you sucked it.

I wish I didn't get musty

[ExAm]

You get grimy instead.

I wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish > ERROR: ExAm.exe has peformed an illegal operation and needs to close. Sorry for the inconvenince.

[CodeBrain]

You get grimy instead.

I wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish > ERROR: ExAm.exe has peformed an illegal operation and needs to close. Sorry for the inconvenince.

Granted. ExAm.exe has been revived.

I wish I could hack games so it is harder to play

[Bodzilla]

Granted -- but it will happen in a few billion years.

I wish I may I wish I might. Ha! Good luck with that one!
have this wish i wish tonight.
i want that star, i want it now.
i want it now and i dont care how.

[Mr Buckshot]

I wish I could hack games so it is harder to play

Granted but somehow you get found out and you get banz0red from the game.

I wish I had an A in English

[legionaire45]

Wish granted, but you fail an elective because you put all your effort into English and can't go to college.

I wish my friend would fucking GIVE ME HIS GOD DAMN FILES FOR THIS PROJECT.

[Huero]

Granted, but he accidentally sends you kiddie porn mixed in with the files.

I wish I had a delicious, delicious orange

[Cortexian]

Granted, but he accidentally sends you kiddie porn mixed in with the files.

I wish I had a delicious, delicious orange
Granted, it was infested with worms.

I wish you would all buy me airsoft guns.

[Mr Buckshot]

Granted, but they're all broken.

I wish plane tickets were cheaper.

[Atty]

Granted, but they're all broken.

I wish plane tickets were cheaper.Granted, but your plane will be hijacked and used for terrorism.

I wish I could grow into it.

[Bodzilla]

but you cant cause your name is green.

i wish teekiepoop would answer my Profile messages.

i poured my heart and soul into that wtf D:

[Boo Diddly]

but you cant cause your name is green.

i wish teekiepoop would answer my Profile messages.

i poured my heart and soul into that wtf D:

Granted but modacity crashes and rolls back before you can read it.

I wish I had a soda.

[p0lar_bear]

Granted, but it's flat.

I wish I hadn't left my copy of Halo 3 at my friend's house.

[legionaire45]

Granted, instead you left the disk in the microwave. 30 seconds ago. When you started the microwave up.

I wish I could stop giving people second chances.

[Bodzilla]

granted but you systematuically murder every person on the planet and drift into isanitosis as an outsider.

i want my doritoes chiop packer to be bigger.

[p0lar_bear]

Granted, but the price of your durritos goes up with the size increase. You can no longer afford them.

I wish I could stop posting in this thread.

[Bodzilla]

granted but you have an un satiable appetite for lamb chops.

moar booze plz.

[itszutak]

granted but you have an un satiable appetite for lamb chops.

moar booze plz.
Granted, but it's Everclear. You die of alcohol poisoning.

I want a fucking 24" 1920x1200, foldable, OLED screen.

[ExAm]

Granted. I be now you're wishing you specified that it was working.

I wish my head didn't hurt so bad.

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, but your balls are killing you.
Lay off the bengay.

I wish my computer would never crash.

[itszutak]

Granted, but your balls are killing you.
Lay off the bengay.

I wish my computer would never crash.
Granted, but that's because the power supply blew.

I wish there were three more hours in a day.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but you have to work

I wish I knew how to work Mac

[n00b1n8R]

Granted.http://sa.tweek.us/emots/images/emot-laugh.gif

I wish for better internets.

[sdavis117]

Granted, but all of the good stuff on the internet is blocked.

I wish I knew the name of the girl in Badzilla's avatar.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but she's a trans

I wish I could join the Navy now :S

[Chainsy]

Granted, but you become the 1st mate's bitch and have to give him blow jobs all day.

I wish my girlfriend would stop having mega rage pmsing each time of the month.

[thehoodedsmack]

Granted. We kill your girlfriend.

I wish I had laser vision.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but you blow everything up with them.

I wish Mac wasn't so shitty. (I hate it now)

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, everything you look at bursts into flames.

I wish my hair was more curly (got it cut this arvo D: )

[sevlag]

Granted, everything you look at bursts into flames.

I wish my hair was more curly (got it cut this arvo D: )granted..but birds nest in it and then procced to shit in it

I wish for a Lancer Assault Rifle (the AR from Gears of War)

[ThePlague]

granted..but birds nest in it and then procced to shit in it

I wish for a Lancer Assault Rifle (the AR from Gears of War)
Granted, but it's manual assembly with over 9000 parts.

I wish I could skip school and see F&F today.

[flibitijibibo]

Granted, but you have to sit in between 2 fat fucks.

I wish I could kidnap my girlfriend and have her live with me for spring break without any legal issues.

[sevlag]

Granted, but you have to sit in between 2 fat fucks.

I wish I could kidnap my girlfriend and have her live with me for spring break without any legal issues.granted..but a loop hole allows her to beat you to death with a pipe...

I wish i wish i was a fish :P

[RobertGraham]

granted..but a loop hole allows her to beat you to death with a pipe...

I wish i wish i was a fish :P
Granted, but your stuck in a Nuclear Waste infected river

I wish I had more time on my hands

[mech]

Granted, but the watches surgically imbedded into your hands cause them to rot.

I wish I had 500 dollars

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but you spend it on hookers with Herpes

I wish I wouldn't make a stupid wish

[ICEE]

Granted, but you spend it on hookers with Herpes

I wish I wouldn't make a stupid wish

Granted. You don't make any wish at all.


I wish I had the money to travel around the world

[Rob Oplawar]

Granted. Now all the wishes you make are good, making it that much more painful for you to see them crushed.

e: fuck you, ninjas.

You earn the money by working your ass off all your life, until you die a tired old man 5 days before retirement.

I wish I had studied for that test I just took. D:

[RobertGraham]

Granted. Now all the wishes you make are good, making it that much more painful for you to see them crushed.

e: fuck you, ninjas.

You earn the money by working your ass off all your life, until you die a tired old man 5 days before retirement.

I wish I had studied for that test I just took. D:
Granted, and you failed anyways

I wish I could wish a wish that was the best wish of all wishes. I wish that made sense.

[ICEE]

Granted. Now all the wishes you make are good, making it that much more painful for you to see them crushed.

e: fuck you, ninjas.

You earn the money by working your ass off all your life, until you die a tired old man 5 days before retirement.

I wish I had studied for that test I just took. D:

Granted, but the test is cancelled due to the instructor bludgeoning his spouse to death with a crowbar and lighting himself on fire with AXE BODY SPRAY

E: fuck you, ninjas.

Invalid request. Cannot process multiple wishes.

I wish I wasn't addicted to super mario galaxy

[Huero]

granted, but you're addicted to coke

i wish i didnt hate myself

[Rob Oplawar]

Granted. You don't hate yourself, but everybody else still does.

I wish this damn thread would move slower.

[LlamaMaster]

Granted. You don't hate yourself, but everybody else still does.

I wish this damn thread would move slower.
Granted, but now it's locked.

I wish there were more hours in the day.

[OmegaDragon]

Granted, but sudden change in the earths rotation causes inhalation of all species.

I wish this wish wouldn't get corrupted.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but it got corrupted by a server, so now your wish is invalid

I wish I could get a decent Windows Vista theme :[

[Gwunty]

Granted but you have vista.

I wish for my chest to stop hurting.

[RobertGraham]

Granted but you have vista.

I wish for my chest to stop hurting.
Granted, but your tits are fully developed

I wish I didn't have to go to dinner tonight to discuss my life after high school with my parents

[p0lar_bear]

Granted but you have vista.

I wish for my chest to stop hurting.

Granted, but now you have an embarrasing rash.

I wish I had a spare 1gb MicroSD card.

[Huero]

granted, but it's haunted by the spirit of a time-traveling pirate

i wish i could have sex with this drum

[Gwunty]

Granted but it gives you AIDS

I wish I didn't owe 40$ to the school, or any money.

[Rob Oplawar]

Granted, but you have terrible grammar.

I wish to surpass Ross in rep points.

[p0lar_bear]

Granted, but Modacity shuts down shortly after.

If I could have just one wish, I would like a tasty fish.

[sevlag]

Granted, but Modacity shuts down shortly after.

If I could have just one wish, I would like a tasty fish.granted...but the fish was basted in cyanide so you die

I wish the kids at the halomaps forums would grow up

[Huero]

granted, but they're all pedophiles

i wish i was competent enough to build a computer

[sevlag]

granted, but they're all pedophiles

i wish i was competent enough to build a computergranted...but you forget how to breath and you die

I wish...hmm, how about I wish for a F-22 Raptor fighter jet

[mech]

Granted, but you can't fly it.

I wish my shit wasn't green.

[leorimolo]

Granted, but you get detention

I still wish I had a MacBook Pro
Your stupid ass managed to break it after you got it back.

I wish I could go snowboarding right now

[Spartan094]

It snows endlessly and you freeze to death after you get throw out of the Himalayas

I wish i could reverse time

[Bodzilla]

Granted, but all of the good stuff on the internet is blocked.

I wish I knew the name of the girl in Badzilla's avatar.
Matsumoto from Breach
Bleach.

[Mr Buckshot]

It snows endlessly and you freeze to death after you get throw out of the Himalayas

I wish i could reverse time

Granted but your time-reversing machine breaks down and leaves you trapped in the caveman era.

I wish Shakespeare never existed (along with Fyodor Dostoevsky and many more...)

[Rentafence]

Granted, but then the dark ages extends for another thousand years.

I wish I had 4 AA batteries.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but then the dark ages extends for another thousand years.

I wish I had 4 AA batteries.
Granted, but they are dollar tree batteries

I wish I had a sense of humor

[Mr Buckshot]

Granted, but then the dark ages extends for another thousand years.

I wish I had 4 AA batteries.

Granted, but they're all dead.

I wish my laptop had HDMI-in instead of HDMI-out so I can play PS3 through its screen.

[Syuusuke]

Granted, but the genie is a prick and un-grants it.

I wish I knew how this thread got to 231 posts already.

[Hotrod]

Granted, but then your brain explodes, and you forget everything afterward.

I wish it were the date of my birthday tomorrow.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but then your brain explodes, and you forget everything afterward.

I wish it were the date of my birthday tomorrow.
Granted, but you mysteriously wake up and you are a saggy old man

I wish I could go with these 2 chicks to the mall

[Saggy]

Granted, but you mysteriously wake up and you are a saggy old man

I wish I could go with these 2 chicks to the mall
Granted, but it's your mom and your sister.

I wish I was fat.

[Hotrod]

Granted, you're the fattest man alive, and die because of it.

I wish I wasn't so tired.

[cheezdue]

Granted, but you get fat like Saggy.

I wished I could let go of my feelings for my ex and see her as a friend.

[RobertGraham]

Granted, but you get fat like Saggy.

I wished I could let go of my feelings for my ex and see her as a friend.
Granted, now she is your step sister

I wish I could find this damn song! (Honeycut - Exodus Honey (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmb1t8RMsu4))

[Hotrod]

Granted, but you can't download it.

I wish I could have some ice cream right now.

[ultama121]

Granted, but it melts in the blazing sun.

I wish that I had the motivation to do something right now.

[Chainsy]

Granted, but its excessive masturbation and it chafes.

I wish that black horse actually does as its name implies.

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, but it tramples you.

I wish my milkshake could bring all the boys to the yard.

[sevlag]

Granted, but it tramples you.

I wish my milkshake could bring all the boys to the yard.

granted...but the sexual abuse charges from the sheer fugly ness causes you to become homeless on the side of the street while having hallucinations of you in a footbal game screamin "TOUCHDOWN!!!"

I wish crappy bands would just die

[n00b1n8R]

Granted, resulting in room for even worse bands.

I wish for lots of rice.

[p0lar_bear]

Granted. You die of over ingestion.

I wish I could four-shot bad kids on XBox Live.

[RobertGraham]

Granted. You die of over ingestion.

I wish I could four-shot bad kids on XBox Live.
Granted, but the bad kids always get splatter sprees

I wish I could get my disks ripped to my computer

[Abdurahman]

Granted, but the bad kids always get splatter sprees

I wish I could get my disks ripped to my computer


Granted, but as soon as you finish ripping your last disk, your hard drive fails.

I wish I had an expensive car.

[Mr Buckshot]

I wish I had an expensive car.

Granted, but it's ultra unreliable and spends more time in the service shop than in your garage.

I wish the PSP had two analog sticks.

[SnaFuBAR]

Granted, but someone shoves it up your ass.

I wish buckshot were banned :)

[LlamaMaster]

Granted, but someone shoves it up your ass.

I wish buckshot were banned :)
Granted, but he makes an alt and spams your profile messages with gay yiff.

I wish I knew photoshop.

[Mr Buckshot]

Granted but you have as much skill as SVC with photoshop (difference b/t knowing the path and walking it...)

I wish LlamaMaster's avatar was green.