Girlfriend Trouble

[Wakeboy1337]

Ok so my girl friend is bi-polar and may be schizophrenic, I've known this since we were friends and I never judged her by it because we honestly and truly cared for each other no matter what. But for the past couple months things have been getting a little out of hand at times and I was wondring if anyone had experiance or ideas to help her stablize.

She lives in a high stress home with two younger sisters, the older of the two is lazy and the young one has anger issues big time(that one is for another day). She and I can be working on her homework though and she will ask me to look at something to see what I think and I noticed a grammar mistake and then she YELLS back at me saying I know dont freaking yell at me. I try talking to her about her yelling saying " When you see me yelling you calmly talk to me and I listen, I'm trying to do the same for you by reminding you not to yell and by me not yelling myself." Giving her space doesn't work, it makes her think I'm mad at her and taking her out somewhere, just her and I only works until she's got the stress of home bearing down on her.
She has been on meds for this sort of thing for a while and sees a doctor about every month or so and has a consular she sees weekly. But I dont want to see her going back to the mental hospital I want her to return to normal :(


Basicly I want help to know how I can settle her down during flare-up's and to get her closer to me again.

I'm geting off soon, I feel like shit :(

[Mass]

That sucks balls.

Do you think it's too much stress or what?

[SnaFuBAR]

do you know what the trigger is?

[Wakeboy1337]

That sucks balls.

Do you think it's too much stress or what?
Idk, I wish I could fast forward into the future where it's just her and I in our own place with out all the stress.



do you know what the trigger is?

Nobody really knows, since in her house the high stress keeps her boiling all the time.

[Jean-Luc]

Well, I myself am bi-polar and clinically depressed, so I do believe you are correct in your diagnosis of her condition. Definitely for her, being in a high-stress environment will not help, and is a very likely culprit as to the outbursts you mentioned.

As for treatment, it is good that she is taking her meds, but if I could offer any advice as to move to a more stable state is to do anything humanly possible to lower her stress level.

Believe you me, I've been in a high stress environment while I'm bipolar, and it made me prone to outbursts as well.

[Bad Waffle]

Well, i know how its like dating a crazy chick. Of course, i finally threw in the towel.

And for the next two years after that, she still won't leave me alone.

So i think it'd be a good idea if you HELP her become self-dependent, and then get out if it gets worse. And tell her you're getting out if it gets worse. It might be incentive for her to control herself?

[DrunkenSamus]

Get her out of the stressful environment somehow? I've found that music always helps but thats probably because I'm like them most musically inclined person ever.

[Jean-Luc]

Crazy chick...excuse me?
Now, I may be flying off the horn here because I am the same way, but it is definitely uncalled for to deem a person "crazy" because of a medical condition they are unable to prevent.

Bi-polar is a serious condition and should be treated with respect, and a whoooole lot of patience.

[Wakeboy1337]

Well, I myself am bi-polar and clinically depressed, so I do believe you are correct in your diagnosis of her condition. Definitely for her, being in a high-stress environment will not help, and is a very likely culprit as to the outbursts you mentioned.

As for treatment, it is good that she is taking her meds, but if I could offer any advice as to move to a more stable state is to do anything humanly possible to lower her stress level.

Believe you me, I've been in a high stress environment while I'm bipolar, and it made me prone to outbursts as well.
Bad thing is, there really is no way to get her out of the stressful environment.




Well, i know how its like dating a crazy chick. Of course, i finally threw in the towel.

And for the next two years after that, she still won't leave me alone.

So i think it'd be a good idea if you HELP her become self-dependent, and then get out if it gets worse. And tell her you're getting out if it gets worse. It might be incentive for her to control herself?

WOL is she isn't a "crazy" and I wouldn't say something like that to her because that wouldnt help anything at all, we've been together for a real good while now and she knows I wouldn't leave over something like this, especially since it isn't her fault and she can't control this without help.


Get her out of the stressful environment somehow? I've found that music always helps but thats probably because I'm like them most musically inclined person ever. She is VERY into music, she can play alot of instruments. And she loves KISS. Maybe I can put my mp3 player on a set of speakers while she does chores and homework?

[Zeph]

dump the bitch. it'll just get worse.

[k4is3rxkh40s]

She is VERY into music, she can play alot of instruments. And she loves KISS. Maybe I can put my mp3 player on a set of speakers while she does chores and homework?

The only thing with that is, it may or may not always work. Just as you said earlier, it is unexpected, and even through all the precautions, she can still have the sudden change in emotion. I've dated a bi-polar girl before, and I found it best to just talk to her like you normally would, as if she wasn't yelling, and etc. During those flare-ups she might take things you say as criticizing her, insulting her, etc.

[Wakeboy1337]

dump the bitch. it'll just get worse.

No, cut off your fingers.



The only thing with that is, it may or may not always work. Just as you said earlier, it is unexpected, and even through all the precautions, she can still have the sudden change in emotion. I've dated a bi-polar girl before, and I found it best to just talk to her like you normally would, as if she wasn't yelling, and etc. During those flare-ups she might take things you say as criticizing her, insulting her, etc.
sounds like some good advice right there.

[SexyTime]

Kill the bitch.

[Bodzilla]

look man trust me on this. It will only end in tears.

not a path you want to go down because i've been there as well man.... too many times.

She's gotta get out an see the world and find a place of her own before she'll calm down, and that will not happen for many years.
so why go down with a sinking ship.

[Pope]

dump the bitch. it'll just get worse.

Zeph's a little harsh with what he's saying but he's got the right point. If you're willing to go onto a forum and tell us her life story, something is wrong with the relationship. Cut your losses, if you stay with her and her condition deteriorates it'll just be harder. You're delaying the inevitable and you can always be friends in the end.

[Zeph]

If they're having emotional problems now, imagine how it'll be when they have to pay bills, keep themselves fed under a roof, and take care of their life on their own.
I've gone through two iterations of a relationship with a girl like that. The second one was much worse. My cousin's wife was/is the same way; except she's actually tried to kill him.

Life is not going to be perfect. It's not going to ever be a happy stress-less environment. Save yourself the trouble and end it.

[Bad Waffle]

Pope, you can never be friends in relationships like this.

Wakeboy, i was IN YOUR SITUATION. I didn't realize how crazy it was till i got out. Mark my words, you're going to hate yourself for doing this to yourself a month or so after the breakup.

[Pope]

Pope, you can never be friends in relationships like this.
You can be friends, but nothing more. I guess I may not have had the exact same experience with these situations as you guys.

[Tweek]

try just hugging her.

[Matooba]

I also went out with a girl with bi-polar / manic depression. It wasnt a easy relationship. Ultimitely in my case it ended with me leaving her. Its a lot of work and will comsume you. Check out this site (http://www.bipolar.com/living_with_bipolar_disorder/leisure_time.html), read up on what you can do. Good Luck with your girlfriend and relationship. I hope yours turned out better then mine did.

[Pooky]

http://img143.imageshack.us/img143/4112/lolzephmg5.png

That's your idea of retaliation rep Zeph? :lol:

[Choking Victim]

Wrap her in a towel, press the power button and let her run for 5 minutes. Then remove the towel and she should run alright for a few hours.

Hope it works out.

Fakeedit: ohh wait....