Dole
June 17th, 2007, 07:36 PM
I just got back, and oh man, was this a terrible movie. The plot driving the movie is wracked with more holes than swiss cheese, the delivery of themes and life lessons is irritatingly blatant and puerile, the story felt like it was drawn up in a few hours specifically just so they could make a sequel, there were so many inconsistencies and flaws, and as a whole this movie was more dissapointing than both Spider-Man 3 AND the first Fantastic Four.
And considering how excellent the storyline of the original comics with the Silver Surfer were, both the fact that they shied away from the original story and the fact that the comics were so much indescribably better than the screenplay that ended up being translated into a movie are nothing short of amazing to me.
First let's start off with the characters. Any spoilers ahead will be wrapped in spoiler tags accordingly. If I miss anything in the following list of grievances and problems, it's only because this movie was so unmemorable and I cared so little for any little details.
Richard Reed (Mr. Fantastic)
-Okay.
In the first movie they explain that their adapted space jumpsuits evolved in the cosmic radiation along with them. As lame as that is, I am forced to accept that. However, that still doesn't explain why his casual wear and suits are able to stretch as far as he does instead of just his arm extending past the sleeves of a regular polyester tuxedo.
Johnny Storm (The Human Torch)
-When he touches The Thing and turns into orange rock (as seen in the commercial), why isn't his voice changed and made raspy the same as Michael Chichlis' was?
Sue Storm (The Invisible Woman)
-Trying to make a half-mexican, half-God-knows-what-else look like an Aryan with badly dyed hair and blue contacts doesn't work. Period.
Are you telling me in all of Hollywood they couldn't find a blue-eyed, D-cup blonde to play this part? Are you fucking kidding me?
Ben Grimm (The Thing)
<<coming soon>>
Viktor von Doom (Dr. Doom)
<<coming soon>>
The Silver Surfer
<<coming soon>>
Plot Holes
<<HUGE LIST, coming soon>>
I don't have much more time for now, but go ahead and tell me what you thought of the movie.
And considering how excellent the storyline of the original comics with the Silver Surfer were, both the fact that they shied away from the original story and the fact that the comics were so much indescribably better than the screenplay that ended up being translated into a movie are nothing short of amazing to me.
First let's start off with the characters. Any spoilers ahead will be wrapped in spoiler tags accordingly. If I miss anything in the following list of grievances and problems, it's only because this movie was so unmemorable and I cared so little for any little details.
Richard Reed (Mr. Fantastic)
-Okay.
In the first movie they explain that their adapted space jumpsuits evolved in the cosmic radiation along with them. As lame as that is, I am forced to accept that. However, that still doesn't explain why his casual wear and suits are able to stretch as far as he does instead of just his arm extending past the sleeves of a regular polyester tuxedo.
Johnny Storm (The Human Torch)
-When he touches The Thing and turns into orange rock (as seen in the commercial), why isn't his voice changed and made raspy the same as Michael Chichlis' was?
Sue Storm (The Invisible Woman)
-Trying to make a half-mexican, half-God-knows-what-else look like an Aryan with badly dyed hair and blue contacts doesn't work. Period.
Are you telling me in all of Hollywood they couldn't find a blue-eyed, D-cup blonde to play this part? Are you fucking kidding me?
Ben Grimm (The Thing)
<<coming soon>>
Viktor von Doom (Dr. Doom)
<<coming soon>>
The Silver Surfer
<<coming soon>>
Plot Holes
<<HUGE LIST, coming soon>>
I don't have much more time for now, but go ahead and tell me what you thought of the movie.