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View Full Version : I actually got attacked by a bunch of 5 year olds today



Bad Waffle
May 2nd, 2008, 11:35 PM
http://img99.imageshack.us/img99/3923/img0654df0.jpg

http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/9623/img0655ps7.jpg

Ok, they werent five--but they were tiny. I pass a middle school on my way to school every morning, and i walked today because it was nice. I have a reputation of selling 'candy' cheap, so i have money to use to spend on food at college later on. Well, i walked up to a group of little guys in front of the school because i was already early. I gave them the 'menu', they bought some, and i was putting away the money when they saw the other money i had for change for a 20. So, i guess the little guys see me every day and they were planning this, so they tried circling me and taking my backpack. Me, being a foot and a half taller, and although looking skinny--i've got the muscles of an 8 year soccer veteran. I kicked one in the balls, pushed him into his friend as one took a swing--a swing which ended up in my grabbing his arm and twisting it behind his back, and then having me swing him behind me to get the damn kid off my backback. Thank god my zippers get caught every once in a while. Although while this was happening, i left my left side undefended, and this little guy actually grabbed onto my arm long enough to BITE HARD. What the hell is wrong with these goddamned kids nowadays? is there something in the water?

well, i managed to break free after that, and then i broke into a run until i got to an intersection where those little fuckers could be seen, and well, they chickened out. So i notice blood on my hand, and i check the bite mark--sure enough, blood. I got some on my shirt, which sucked, but i rolled it up before anything else happened. I had some tissue paper used for my art projects as a smuge tool, so i used that. As i got to my school i talked to the nurse, which i know well thanks to always being in there. I told her i fell while walking to class, because i didn't feel like being known for getting attacked by a group of middle schoolers. I got this kickass purple bandage thing though, it matched my shirt!

Man, you don't know how hard it was to explain to everybody why i was bleeding and had a huge purple caste looking thing on. I just told them it was 5 year olds, and of course they rolled their eyes and went "right, ok chris". A great day, lol

Sel
May 2nd, 2008, 11:38 PM
I have a reputation of selling 'candy' cheap,

Errrm

ICEE
May 2nd, 2008, 11:41 PM
I'd like to buy some candy... I swear I wont bite you.

Bad Waffle
May 2nd, 2008, 11:42 PM
yeah, candy



chocolate
butterfinger
hersheys
milkyway
snickers
crunch
twix
baby ruth
3 musketeers
Fruity
nerds rope
nerds (box)
skittles
regular
wild berry
tropical
sour
starburst
regular
baja
tropical
jeez, what else would i mean by candy ;)

Agamemnon
May 2nd, 2008, 11:42 PM
So basically you experienced Ross's fantasy.

Bad Waffle
May 2nd, 2008, 11:44 PM
Sorry aggy, none of them were black

Sel
May 2nd, 2008, 11:44 PM
yeah, candy


Ass touching
Rape
Rape
Rape
Rape
Rape
Rape
Rape
Regular Touching

Rape
Rape
Rape


Well that was the first thing that came to mind....

Agamemnon
May 2nd, 2008, 11:44 PM
Sorry aggy, none of them were black
Yes, but they were underage.

ICEE
May 2nd, 2008, 11:48 PM
Nerds are best when ground up and snorted through a straw while drinking dr pepper.

Con
May 2nd, 2008, 11:49 PM
haha, you're gonna get rabies.

Zeph
May 2nd, 2008, 11:49 PM
Pwned.

Bad Waffle
May 2nd, 2008, 11:50 PM
I GONNA GET RABIES

Sel
May 2nd, 2008, 11:51 PM
I GONNA GET RABIES

Theres nothing hotter to the local ladies than rabies, just go up and bite them and youll have a relationship youll never get tired of.

Bodzilla
May 3rd, 2008, 12:07 AM
This kind of thing never happened 80 years ago, simply because the fuckers knew that after they did it, they had to meet the cane.

Fear has always been the primary way of controlling people and getting them to behave. Look at the history of the church and the Governments.
These people need to know fear again.

Bring back the cane.

ima_from_America
May 3rd, 2008, 12:09 AM
D99NHb6B03s

Boba
May 3rd, 2008, 12:12 AM
this is why you bring around a shank cane man

ima_from_America
May 3rd, 2008, 12:18 AM
http://www.howmanyfiveyearoldscouldyoutakeinafight.com/

n00b1n8R
May 3rd, 2008, 12:29 AM
This kind of thing never happened 80 years ago, simply because the fuckers knew that after they did it, they had to meet the cane.

Fear has always been the primary way of controlling people and getting them to behave. Look at the history of the church and the Governments.
These people need to know fear again.

Bring back the cane.
I find it funny that that post came from you. :p

rossmum
May 3rd, 2008, 12:30 AM
God I hate fucking useless parents. Some people should be banned from having kids, seriously.

Also, I hate pretty much most children these days. They're little pricks.

PlasbianX
May 3rd, 2008, 12:50 AM
http://www.modacity.net/forums/showthread.php?t=7850&highlight=fend


So did ya fight off the same amount as that calc said you would? :3

Bad Waffle
May 3rd, 2008, 01:42 AM
ok, so i took off the bandage, and as i ripped off the, it started bleeding again, but its really clear red blood, kinda like cranberry juice--doesnt look dark or opaque enough to be blood, but its leaking out of me. Ive never seen blood like this.

Pooky
May 3rd, 2008, 01:45 AM
Maybe that means you have no soul?

Agamemnon
May 3rd, 2008, 01:46 AM
Also, you should've used one as a weapon. More luls would've ensued.

ultama121
May 3rd, 2008, 02:13 AM
God I hate fucking useless parents. Some people should be banned from having kids, seriously.

Yeah... do I see mandatory tube tying on the horizon? :rolleyes:

Llama Juice
May 3rd, 2008, 02:15 AM
No, just stitch the baby chute closed.

That'd learn em.

ultama121
May 3rd, 2008, 02:19 AM
But who will be brave enough for such a challenge? *Random Cartoon King Voice*

TeeKup
May 3rd, 2008, 11:33 AM
ok, so i took off the bandage, and as i ripped off the, it started bleeding again, but its really clear red blood, kinda like cranberry juice--doesnt look dark or opaque enough to be blood, but its leaking out of me. Ive never seen blood like this.

You must have bled more than you thought. Your hemoglobin count is low, you need to drink a lot of water.

Xetsuei
May 3rd, 2008, 01:25 PM
ok, so i took off the bandage, and as i ripped off the, it started bleeding again, but its really clear red blood, kinda like cranberry juice--doesnt look dark or opaque enough to be blood, but its leaking out of me. Ive never seen blood like this.

This happened to me before, my dad (doctor for over 40 years) said it was nothing to be worried about.

Limited
May 3rd, 2008, 10:21 PM
Sorry but that story is hilarious, sucks you got bitten though, you'll survive though.

I would have hit the first one to attack me really hard, hoping that the others would be like "yeh fuck that.." and just run off. Then again I wouldnt really want to hurt them that bad, sure they attacked you but still they are nieve lil bastards.